and Phenomenology

The Approach:

The most exciting aspect of the Existential Phenomenological Approach is the emphasis on the authentic human experience being that of relationship. In the therapeutic relationship the two persons experience the possibilities in the world that are opened up by the existence of mutual love and respect. The events and perceptions within the client are made real and relevant to the present world as experienced by the client.

Obviously in a neurotic situation the encounter may not reveal these possibilities. The person may be limited by his or her past experience of relationship, or conditioned by events in the past that limit the acceptance of possibility in the future. However even in this situation there is the possibility of transcendence through the relationship     Healing seems to be a necessary to authentic encounter.

Finally I arrive at the concept of risk that is implicit in the approach. In order for the therapist to be in authentic, sustaining and truth-revealing relationship with the client there has to be some openness to all possibility. It can be argued that if the therapist asks the question "Why?"  he or she is trying to elicit causes  - to perhaps marry experience to theory. What is more important is that any questions posed by the therapist should elicit meaning - a way in which the client can both understand and own his or her own intelligent subjective insight. Intellectualizing on reasons can often conceal and inhibit the human person from a process of 'letting go’, forgiveness and self -reconciliation; which in turns allows for the full recognition and enjoyment of the possibilities inherent in the future.

 The authentic individual is more than the sum of learned, cognitive experience.

The experience for the client should be one that sets the individual free by examining the person as a subjective phenomenon. The individual should be encouraged to express what is the reality of him or herself. The client is free to own that which is revealed and engage in a process of becoming more open to the world in which we are all in relationship.

In conclusion it occurs to me that in the preceding paragraphs I have been guilty of the very thing that existentialism warns against - that of abstraction, objectifying. Instead of experiencing an intelligent but subjective view there is an exposition of meaning. I believe in the concrete healing power of relationship and authentic encounter and I believe that the existentialist would/does endeavor to elicit meaning from the relationship. This is not an imposed meaning, but elicits from the interaction between two struggling individuals who care about this bond between them. The therapists risk their own selves in the cause of nurturing, of almost 're-parenting' the other. Both partners in the dialogue try to be honest and fear rejection, an absence of care and support as well as the possibility of ‘violence'.   This experience is not an objective one for either partner. It is  subjective  - as two human persons give of themselves in authenticity.

Thus the relationship may be even intense, but always intra-subjective.

Let the words below speak for themselves …………….

The  CONVERSATION:

Client: I sit in a room taking a quiz, which has no grade value.  My heart is beating, I can hear it.  My palms are clammy and even though I know the answers I also perceive myself dumb.  Why do I panic and why does it matter to me?

Therapist:   Perhaps you experience your failure within your body, in order to be reassured that you are still limited in possibilities.

C:    Are you arguing that I am being dishonest?

T:     Not at all. I am asking you to really feel what it is like to fail, to recognize the experience, to own it and then to let it go - seeing it f or what it really means.

C:       Which is .....

T:        You know your experience better than I.

C:        O.K. I suppose I pay lip service to this philosophy so I should try and experience it.  I see it as a myth, a story I lived by as a child and as a young person.  I was bright but wayward.  But it was intended....

T:        By whom?

C:        By my parents.  My father saw me as the successor after my brother failed to meet the challenge. That happened when I was sixteen, rather late to change focus. But they both tried to get me on the road to success.

T:           Whose success?

C:            Well, my mother wanted a debutante, and my father wanted an intelligent, unfeeling person who had the same values as he.

T:   How did that feel?

Client:         Heavy! As if I couldn't move with the burden dragging on my shoulders. Although the sensation was mainly in my head - still is sometimes. As if there is a heavy band around it that is linked to this mass dragging behind me. I used to get incredible headaches.

Therapist:       Can you feel it now?

C:          Yes, isn't that funny?  Although I haven't got a headache at the moment.   But I really feel as if you were, are, my father and that I have to prove to you that I really am bright. I'm not a debutante though.

T:            Why not go into this experience, this feeling. Let's explore.

C:            My head feels tight, my Palms are cold-clammy, I can hear my heart and I feel tired. I want to leave. I don't want to continue.  I’m both ashamed and frightened!

T:            Frightened?

C:            Yes, either you might get me to feel all these unpleasant things and then laugh at my insecurity or alternatively if I have to give this up - this way of being - then maybe I can never retreat back inside my walls of words and must answer the imperative to use what talent and insight and intelligence that I have - even though it doesn't really have a form yet.

T:           So you may have to let go of the myth that makes sense out of your experience of being you.

C:           Yes. And maybe because I don't know what to put in it's place, or I can't really tell the future.... Someone asked me if I was a ‘channeler’ the other day. I'm not, but I believe that in authentic encounter more is revealed than just the words.

T:         Like what?

C:         Well, you haven't been saying very much but I still feel that I trust  you, you don't appear to be ,judging me. You seem to accept me for what or whom I choose to reveal. I sense that you quite like me and that means that I feel free to quite like myself and start voyaging within. I even feel better talking to you. I still feel ashamed though.

T:          You were going to talk about that.

C:           Was I?  I forget.  If I've been living or perpetuating a cover story then that means I am a liar --- or at the very least  an active participant in a lie. And that makes me feel more ashamed. Ashamed of being the person I was then and for allowing it to continue for so long... and the pain I inflicted on other people. And the wasted time ....

T:           If you really tried you could become responsible directly for the bombing of Hiroshima. (laughs) Other people have a right to their own share of responsibility.

C:           I suppose you're right (laughs). We've really meandered around but I am getting more of a sense of the total picture. That I am responsible, but yet I cannot deny the others influence.  I'm always using the metaphor of the pebble to describe death and I suppose it also applies to life too. That each individual is like a pebble thrown into a pond. …. The pebble sinks out of sight - as if it had never been - but yet the ripples from that one encounter with the surface of the  water radiate outwards infinitely - touching and blending with other ripples from other stones no longer visible. In a sense I get a great deal of peace from that. I feel continuity, intentionality, but yet there is no sense of being driven to take on more than is necessary. Nice...

T:         A very warm image, of infinite ripples expressing the human condition. Where would you put what you choose to call shame in that?

C:          Ah, well. I suppose I must answer that.... Depends a lot on me. But, I feel relaxed enough to continue - I've nothing to 'prove' to either of us. So ........................ 

(To be continued)

anon ymity beckons you!